It’s been a little while since I published a post on here, but that doesn’t mean I haven’t had plenty of thoughts as we’ve traveled the sometimes smooth, sometimes bumpy road of pregnancy after loss. Recently, I mentioned to a friend that I had a lot to say about this journey – but not really enough on any one subject to create a blog post. She suggested that I publish a miniseries, so that’s what I’m going to do. Over the next few weeks, I’ll be posting shorter (but more frequent) blog posts on a variety of pregnancy after loss topics.
One thing I didn’t get to do with Brady was put together a nursery. This time, I’m going to get it done before the little guy arrives.
I know it’s not necessary, because he’s most likely going to sleep in our master bedroom for at least a few months, but I want to do it, so I will. I know there are a lot of mixed feelings among loss moms about setting up a nursery. I can see why moms who have had to pack up a complete nursery that was never used would avoid this task in subsequent pregnancies. I think my perspective comes from the fact that we never got to prep anything for Brady to come home. It’s one of the many secondary losses I’ve had to deal with. Completing a nursery this time feels like it’s for Baby Schmitz #2 and Brady.
I’ve looked back on our mostly unused registry from Brady and am planning to pick up a few items that we wanted for Brady. We’re keeping the color scheme the same too. This feels like a small way to honor Brady and keep his memory alive. Brady never got to sleep in this nursery, but he will always have a presence there. Jeff and I still often refer to the nursery as “Brady John’s room”.
I’m planning to do a couple of things differently too. Stars remind me of Brady, and I plan to incorporate a few star items into this nursery as well. This will tie in with Brady’s trunk nicely. Brady’s trunk has been the one constant piece of furniture in the room, and I’m really looking forward to building the rest of the nursery around it.
